Roadtrip RP (after highschool)

[behindTHEmask]

Sometimes people couldn't handle things. Things got hard and they broke down. That's how Matt viewed Carolyn. She ran away so no one would be bothered what problems she hold.
Some called "problems" a weakness.
No one ever saw how hard it was to wake up in the early morning drenched in sweat from the night before after seeing playbacks so vivid. The colors were more detailed than any palot.
Everything just seemed so real.
Memories were more than moments - they were life.
He watched slowly over the menu Carolyn coming out of the bathroom. Here eye's seemed hidden of somesort. Like they were a diversion from the real truth. Her cheeks were graced with pink or maybe red. With complexions, you could never tell.
Matt moved his eyes back to the menu, causually glancing back to Carolyn, and then to John.

[Sparks]

She sat down carefully, not weighing anything at all.
Carolyn had seen John and Matt's eyes connect for a sliver of a second before she took her seat. She didn't feel like proving herself, though. It didn't matter which secrets were present on her face, or which lies were dying in her eyes.
John was eyeing his menu now, but not reading it.
Carolyn could see an exhaustion forming on his features that she guessed would take years to wipe away.
That is how it is with these things, though.
A waitress strode up to their table and smiled widely at all three of them. Her teeth were perfect, Carolyn noticed. So much perfection in such small places. She barely understood theh words that issued from the girl's mouth.
"Are you ready for me to take your order, or would you like a few more minutes?"
"I'll order now," Carolyn said, before anyone else spoke. "Just a coffee and whatever your most popular sandwich is."
The girl grinned again, and Carolyn, normally one to smile back, found she could not. She looked down at the table.
"All right," said the girl, a bit less sure of herself. "And yourself?" she asked John.
He seemed to be hit out of a daze. "What? ...Oh, just an iced tea and your cheeseburger."
He smiled tightly, and the young girl, a bit less apprehensively, turned her eyes on Matt.
John had always had that effect on people. Whatever it was about him, it seemed to make most everyone else nervous.
Carolyn thought, maybe that's a good way to be.
But she didn't follow the thought. She just wanted to taste the coffee in her throat. She was living for it, now.

[ScarletMornings]

omg, fourteen PAGES? geez. that's amazing.

[behindTHEmask]

Matt kept his eyes off Carolyn and John and ran them softly over the table and up the girl. A light smile graced his lips in attempt to comfort her. Tension wasn't the word to use, but something was just forcing everyone to back down from highs of life.
Death took away more than a soul - it took away everyones.
"I'll just have a water."
Hunger wasn't exactly the first thing on Matt's mind. And even if he was hungry, he couldn't eat. Food wouldn't compensate for any loss he felt.
People died in the eyes of who sat before him.
And even if he knew how much they were hurting, the moment didn't make him hurt more than they did.
Focus was drawn to them.
Save everyone else before you save yourself.
"In a bottle, if you have 'em." A slow nod accented the certainty.
Save the world, and try to have time for you later.

[Sparks]

Upon recieving the sandwich and lifting it to her lips, Carolyn found she couldn't eat.
She wasn't even a little bit hungry anymore.
It was like a permanent roadblock had been constructed in her throat - one that barely let out words, and let absolutely nothing that had to be chewed, in.
So she gave up, and downed a massive mouthful of her coffee. It didn't taste like what she'd imagined. It didn't taste like anything at all.
She set down the half-drained mug and looked from Matt to John.
They both looked exhausted, she realized. John had a very distinct line between his eyebrows that indicated deep thought.
She decided that this silence, were it to go on, would be the death of them.
"I don't think we can avoid talking about what we're going to do, anymore," she stated suddenly, calmly - not betraying anything she felt whatsoever. "I've been thinking about it, and I'm not entirely sure I want to leave with nothing."
She thought of the photo album that was comprised solely of pictures of all the family members and friends and places she had ever loved.
"I can't drop everything and go, I'm sorry," she told John, now.
He nodded slowly, staring blankly at the table. After a minute he seemed to come out of this trance. "Do you want me to go back with you, then?"
"I don't want to stay there. I always said I'd get out. Better leave of my own accord than run from anything," she said. She was sick of running.
The silence came back, but this time it wasn't awkward.
John looked at her carefully, as if trying to pry into her thoughts. "Okay," he agreed solemnly, next turning his eyes to Matt, who appeared to have been listening to every word. "Would you mind us tripping back with you, then?"

[behindTHEmask]

"You live in Port Royal?" He was never sure if they had established such a relationship. They shared stories of their past, but never very many of the present.
He blinked, and a light buzz came from his pants.
Stop right there, and get your mind out of the gutter.
His hand went up, gesturing to excuse him for a moment. Again, the phone read Adams. He should have been there by now. They were probably assuming he was dead.
Outside, the light air refreshed him from being confided into glass. "Hello?"
"Mathew, where are you?"
A small smile ran across his lips. People in this world still worried about his well being. "I'm not sure. Somewhere on the way. We were hungry - "
She cut him off. "We?"
"Carolyn, John, and I."
"They're still with you."
"Yeah, I'm just going to -"
"Are they all right?" Her voice wavered in worry again.
"They're fine. They just need a ride. I'll be there soon."
"They know they're always welcome."
"I told them, but them seem keen on their plan. I don't want to invade on subjects I don't belong." The palm of his hand slowly rubbed the back of his neck. The summer heat was beginning to stick.
"You just make sure you get here in one piece."
"There are never guarentees."
"Mathew."
"I'll see you soon." End was pressed on the phone, and he slowly made his way back through the door, and back to the booth. He slid back into the booth, and looked at John and Carolyn.
"Now, what was I asking?" An eyebrow arched as he looked at the two. A new sense of excitement took over him - like he couldn't wait till time ticked by.
"Oh yeah, where do you live, again?"

[Sparks]

"We live in Port Royal, yeah," said John, with a raised eyebrow. "Pretty close to where Cameron used to live, right?"
Lived. Lies.
Carolyn nodded. "Yeah. God, sometimes I miss him."
Her newest losses hadn't added up yet. Maybe in a few years they would show themselves, but not here, and not now.
It never seemed like the present meant much. It was all they ever truly had, Carolyn realized, but still it seemed such a fake thing. Just about as real as the past or the future, neither of which could be touched.
"I wonder what we're going to tell their parents," came John's voice.
She looked up to catch him running both of his hands through his hair.
"We're deserters now," he said. "We've already separated ourselves from the whole scene. If we get caught out here, we can be detained by the police. They'll be looking for us back in Port Royal too. There's nowhere to go."
"If you run, they won't get you," carolyn told him. "it's just a matter of how far you're willing to go."
He sat, stirring the ice cubes in his empty cup of iced tea. Deep in thought.
But this time, he had a strained look to his face. He was experiencing an inner struggle that nobody could grasp.
"I'm going to let you two go on," he said finally.
Carolyn argued immediately. "What? You-"
"No, listen. I'll tell the police you never got in the car, Carolyn."
"No!" she exclaimed. "You can't-"
He push his palm under her chin and lifted her jaw, staring her down, uncompromising.
"I'm doing this. You two are going to be able to handle this just fine. I'll take care of talking to the families, I'll be the only survivor. I'll go to the funerals, I'll go back to Port Royal eventually."
She eyed him incredulously. "You can't make yourself..."
"I need to stay there for as long as this takes. If only one of us needs to, I'd rather it be me than you. Go on with your life. Nothing good could come from us hanging around each other forever, anyways - look what's just happened. You're always going to remind me of the day my brother died. I'll always remind you, too. And I can't let that happen.
"So, that's my decision. I'm staying behind and sorting things out. You two will go back to the Port, and you'll take care of whatever business you need to. Then, move on. I'll go back too, but in a few days. I might live there for a few more years. I can't walk, there are still people that need me."
He had let go of Carolyn.
She watched him blankly. He had really thought about this.
Somehow, arguing seemed oddly futile. She wanted him to come back with them. She wanted to be able to divide this pain. She wanted to... things she wasn't even sure of.
"It's the only way. So, I'm going to call a taxi from here to take me back to the hospital."
He pulled a wad of bills out of his pocket and traded a few into his other hand. When he seemed to think he had enough, he tossed the rest of the wad on the table in front of Carolyn.
"No," she said right away.
"Your call," John said, sliding out of the booth. "I'm gonna miss ya."
He looked over at Matt. "Listen, man, thank you so much for everything." There was a genuine gratitude present on his features. "I owe you my life. If you ever need anything at all, call up the Adams's, and they'll know where to reach me. And I mean anything. You're saving the fuckin' world."
Carolyn continued with her blank stare as he looked back at her. At only a few feet away, he reached over and pushed a clump of hair that had fallen out of the ponytail, behind her ear. He paused there for a second, and then drew his arm back and nodded to both of them.
"G'bye," he said. "Make your lives worth it."
And as he disappeared through that front door, Carolyn knew she would probably never see him again.

[behindTHEmask]

Matt didn't know what to say. Words couldn't describe how his eyes shifted over John as he spoke. They glossed themselves after one blink. They containted fear, but most of all, admiration. John was putting all the weight on him to save Carolyn.
He was the only one saving the world.
John didn't seem to have an ounce of selfisheness containted in him.
"That's what the world should be made of." The worlds slipped right off Matt's tongue, but he couldn't take them back. Even if he didn't mean them, the statement wasn't his to own anymore.
It was the worlds.
"Where do you want to be?" The question was slowly pushed to Carolyn as Matt continued to watch John leave. Even if he wasn't visible anymore, Matt knew where he was heading.
That John was taking control of his life.
That he wasn't letting something stop him.
That he held his head up, without showing a sign of regret.
He repeated, in his head, the question Where do you want to be?
Only my heart fucking knows.

[Sparks]

Carolyn stared at the door as it hung there in its hinges. The only other survivor had just taken off. He wasn't coming back.
She crossed her arms and leaned back agaisnt the cushion, not feeling much of anything except a long string of shock. She was flatlining, mentally.
After about a minute of complete silence, she turned her eyes on the money that John had tossed in front of her.
"I can't believe he's doing this," she uttered. "No way."
There had to be a good thousand dollars in the bundle of bills.
Silence again for another minute. Matt seemed as shocked as she was.
It was going to be evening soon. They couldn't stay in the diner forever.
Trying to push John's selfless act out of her mind, Carolyn tightened her facial features and looked up at Matt.
"Is this okay?" she asked quietly. "I guess I'm tagging along, now."

[behindTHEmask]

Matt nodded. "I don't mind." He took his wallet out of his pocket, pulling out a plastic card and handed it to the waitress. "I don't mind at all."
Because that was Matt, people didn't bother him.
People just needed help.
"But me not minding isn't really the issue here," he stated. "Where is it that you want to be?"
Deep down inside, everyone had that plan of if they'd ever run away. They knew where they were running to, what was going to happen, how long they'd stay. But when the time came, people just forgot. They froze up, and ended up somewhere they never wanted to be.
"I don't want to force you to go anywhere you don't want to be."
Brace yourself with all that you have.
Matt just wanted to help her. He had as much time as he needed. He was never running away, he was running to.

[Sparks]

"No, oh, really, that's not important," Carolyn said. "I'll just go with you, you've got somewhere to be, I need to think over what I'm going to do with my life."
She had no need for time, though. She'd had her whole life to think it over, and where had that gotten her? No fucking where. It was time to make some moves and just live in the moment.
"We'll go back and I guess I'll visit the...Cameron's family...and, from there, I won't slow you down anymore. This is me being baggage, it's my problem, not your fault at all."
She felt like she was making redundant points. Break. Break break.
"Maybe tonight we should stay somewhere, and actually get on the interstate in the morning," she suggested. "I don't think night driving is a good idea. I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again."
She sighed. Looking at the bills on the table, she picked them up and stuffed them into her pocket.
"I don't really care where we go. You can take me anywhere," she said.
She didn't mind, really.
"I just want to be away from here," she finished. "Anywhere but here."

[behindTHEmask]

He nodded. "It's only around four, and it's summer - the sun is up for a longer time." He shrugged. "But it's up to you."
Like he said to himself before, he wasn't going to force her to do anything.
If she didn't feel comfortable with it, they'd find a hotel.
The woman came back with his card, and he signed his name across the line. Independance didn't feel to exciting when you still pay with the credit card your parents pay for.
But he was out of the house, right?
Step one.

[Sparks]

Carolyn found herself outside the restaurant.
There were suddenly short blank spaces in her memory. It felt like there was carpal tunnel syndrome in her arms. Her headache had returned, and still her muscles shook, ever so slightly. It might go away some time in the near future.
She tried to read Matt's expression, but found he was not the easiest to do this to. He looked just a whole lot tireder than she had seen him yet; the majority of this was her fault, she realized.
But she'd known him before they had ever met.
She'd known Cameron; they were different people, but little bits of them were the same. There were even bits of her in him. Bits of everyone in everyne else, like you only are who you meet in your life. You're made up of every person you ever come in contact with.
She was part Cody, part John, part Craig, part Matt, part parents, part Cameron.
It was about quarter after four now.
They were on the pavement, going towards Matt's car.
You couldn't expect people to be wholes, she thought abstractedly. She knew she must have been getting tired.
People are only pieces. You take the best parts of them and do not hold the rest against them.
It's the only way to live, she thought, following Matt's footsteps meticulously. The only way.

[behindTHEmask]

"Are you okay?" He unlocked the doors to the SUV. It seemed bigger, now. Like it engulfed everyone's passions and memories and expanded to gain more excitement in life - to gain a new taste of freedom.
He supposed they'd just grab a hotel. Honestly, Matt didn't want to force Carolyn into anything. He'd phone Cameron's parents and explain, and they'd be there in the morning for breakfast. Fluffy eggs, crisp strips of bacon, a glass of orange juice, it'd be just like old times - just without Cameron.
A light sigh floated off his lips. "There's a hotel just up the road. I've stayed there a few times, it's a decent one. Sound good to you?"