Julie

[Ramona]

I just finished writing this, and I think i9t's a nice, simple, raw emotion-y, little poem.

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Jules, what I meant wasn’t what I said,
I’d fallen for you heels over head,
I tried to say it, but it came out wrong,
I didn’t mean to string you along.

I’m sorry for all the things that I know,
I’m sorry for everything even though,
Most of it was your fault for lying,
I’m sorry that my words left you crying.

I think, Julie, that through it all,
My heart will still heed your call,
I feel you tug at the ends of my soul,
I think that you’re my self control.

All I’ve known, I’ve known through you,
All I’ve seen, I’ve seen from your view,
All I do, I do for your sake,
All I feel, are feelings you make.

Julie, I’d love to make it all go away,
But sometimes I just don’t know what to say,
Forever, for always, honest and for true,
You know that I will always love you.

[Confusion]

i like the idea a lot! perhaps would seem slightly more emotional and less jolly if there was a little less rhyming? but other than that i really like it!

[Queen of Rain]

the rhyming makes it a little to jolly yes; you could use more fragments... but the idea is great! i love the feeling

[Ramona]

Thanks, I would have it a free-verse poem, but I just don't think very many of my free-verse efforts are very good, though I guess forcing it to rhyme is worse. Thanks again.