Hello There Killer

[ScarletMornings]

Sickly sweet silver
flash in the light
blade’s trickle of warm and wet smiles
underlined by a depth of kohl shadows
wild guesses in the dark of the sun
as I glance at you and wonder
where you’ve been
and what you’ve done

Beautiful barbed arrows
fletched with disillusion
carefully test and probe your granite walls
unbreached by loving concern
you wrap yourself in glinting steel
and I can’t guess what you think
don’t know if I want to at that
or even speculate at what you feel

Down, down, down you take it
careful not to smudge the color
vivid wellings of fevered imagination
you murder innocence
of those you take
and leave behind
I'm thinking you must have been at it again
dare I ask?
darkness warns me I’ve been here before
shrill sanity screams I won’t like it now
when I didn’t like it then

But your red rum bloodlust
keeps demanding another sacrifice
to the aesthetic god you adore
he drinks the drip-drops of bleeding hearts
left content by murderers
with slashing silver daggers
you fall to your knees
and hear his resounding voices
commands from a cannibal
living in your head
and gladly do you set him free

Gasps of wretched pain
a mere echo reinforcing his will
home you brought your miserable god
and hailed me at the door
obvious expectation of my humble greeting
bronzing and flowing in your blood-stained face
well, hello there killer
whose heart did you break today?
one by one you will slay them all
abject despair a fitting incense
for your treacherous god
heartbreak, they call him
he and I are old friends, as you might recall

[Robin]

"underlined by a depth of kohl shadows
wild guesses in the dark of the sun"

Very dark and beautiful imagery. I'm reminded not of a Middle Eastern woman, but of a Russian/Gypsy girl; dark, mysterious, beautiful, and deadly, even in broad daylight. You know she means business, even if she's busy showing you her underpants.

"Beautiful barbed arrows
fletched with disillusion"

Excellent imagery there, and a very good idea. I've seen people described as arrows, but never actions.

"vivid wellings of fevered imagination"

Haha. Not only are those 'wellings' vivid, but the imagery here is, too. It's painted a really pretty, nondescript picture in my mind. Like black slashed with a burnt orange-borderline-red color. Very pretty.

"But your red rum bloodlust
keeps demanding another sacrifice"

Do I see a Shining reference, here? "Daddy, what's red rum?" "Red drum? Sounds like something an Indian would take on the warpath." Haha, besides the humor, it's very lovely. The house wanted blood, I suppose, and it wouldn't stop with just Grady. It wanted Jack's blood, and Wendy's blood, and Danny's blood.

"he drinks the drip-drops of bleeding hearts
left content by murderers"

I'm indecisive about 'drip-drops.' On the one hand, it's lovely, and on the other hand, it's almost painfully juvenile and fresh next to the Columbine wet dreams that the rest of the poem is. (And Columbine wet dreams is a good thing...it just sounds nasty). But I can see where it would be a good thing to do, because in the context it's used, it's sounds remarkably Robert Jordan; it has that air that's just naive enough to sound wise. It's very Machin Shin, never-the-less.

"commands from a cannibal
living in your head"

I don't know...this sounds like it should be something grander and more Robinson Crusoe; like 'cannibal king' or 'cannibal lord' or something in that fashion.

"well, hello there killer
whose heart did you break today?"

Made me giggle, for some reason. Ah, probably because it made me happy. I laugh when I'm happy.

"heartbreak, they call him
he and I are old friends, as you might recall"

Nice ending. Leaves it open to interpretation, but strongly suggests a single overarching theme.

[cry,crayola.]

ditto with above.

this is amazing. the imagery throughout is magnificent. it's beautiful, rowe. simply beautiful. the ending was brilliant.

[ScarletMornings]

thank you all very much. i agree, robin, the part about the cannibal didn't seem quite right to me and i was a little unsure about dripdrops also. i'll think about them, scout's honor, and see what i come up with. and yes, there is a shining reference, in fact i wrote a poem called Red Rum because i so liked the idea of it. it's quite strangely violent.

[Sparks]

I honestly really like how you choose words. I guess I mean the variety in the poem, it makes it kind of different and really interesting. But you write a lot of them this way I've noticed, and I dig it.

Good stuff.

[Sparks]

by the way, the line "where've you been and what have you done"

is that a line from a song? My good friend sang a song for this music production at his school and that is a line from it, I'm pretty sure. It goes "I've been under the ground, reading prayers from this old book I found....under the ground, saving it up and spending it all on moving pictures...silent films. oh is this the dream I've been saving...oh where the heart beats slower and slower, to almost nothing."

Sorry I just remembered that, haha. It's a really pretty song.

[ScarletMornings]

if it is, i haven't heard the song? i just liked how it sounded! lol. but thank you a lot for you comment.