Hey Baby

[Pseudomuse]

I'm not much of a song/lyrics writer, but I thought I'd try it out for size. This is the first set of lyrics I've written. It really doesn't have a chorus, but I tried. Please feel free to tell my whatever you think. I'm not sure on the title either.

cheers PM

Hey Baby

Blurring visions
Cascading within the shadow lights
Of something more real
Than war
Something more real
Than peace

If I touched you
Would you look back?
Turn your head and sigh
Hey baby
Hey baby
-- Maybe
But only
-- Maybe

You’re on fire
Placid lake fears
Burned away in blue flame
And it’s something
Nothing I can name
Yours
-- Maybe
But only
-- Maybe

I’ve never got the courage
Up to touch you
To keep you
Afraid to hurt you
But all I wanted to hear
Was
Hey baby
Hey baby
-- Maybe

But you only wanted
Maybe
Hey baby
Hey baby
Turned your head and sighed
-- Maybe

And I’m lost in your blue flame
It’s nothing I can name
Just
Hey baby
Hey baby
-- What about maybe?

[Queen of Rain]

i loved everyhting but the first stanza.. iok it gave great depth to the lyrics bnuut it was off in rhythm and impossible to sing.. i think it deserves a better title than the pretty unoriginal hey baby, however you do fine without a classical chorus

[darktears]

It was quite good for your first song. I agree with queenofrain for you to work on the first stanza.