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Weary
Dec 2, 2007 22:57:00 GMT -8
Post by ScarletMornings on Dec 2, 2007 22:57:00 GMT -8
first in a long time. be nice please? ;D When I am down, and, oh, my soul’s so weary. I feel like I’ve been sad for so long barely gettin’ by and just hangin’ on waiting for that song to come that would send my tired soul soaring.
Take this weary traveler round the bend. Like I’ve been travelin’ for days every turn has led the wrong way there’s nothin’ left to make me stay but I’m too tired to keep movin’ on.
I am weary, let me rest. I just want to lay my head down block out all those sounds let loose with ties keepin’ me bound and rest in peaceful dreams.
Yes, my traveler’s soul is oh so weary. Let me sleep. Let me rest. Then I will fly again.
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Weary
Dec 3, 2007 13:36:36 GMT -8
Post by mswrite on Dec 3, 2007 13:36:36 GMT -8
I like it. It has a tone of tired resignation, but at the same time strength. Maybe that doesn't make sense...but it does to me, and it's a good thing! I like the dropped g's on the gerunds...it softens the entire poem.
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Weary
Dec 5, 2007 18:53:04 GMT -8
Post by cry,crayola. on Dec 5, 2007 18:53:04 GMT -8
i think the flow was a little disrupted by a few extra words here and there, but over all, it went well. it just didn't leave much impacting left for me.
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Weary
Dec 6, 2007 19:24:05 GMT -8
Post by ScarletMornings on Dec 6, 2007 19:24:05 GMT -8
thank you ms. write! that's what i was going for...tired, but knowing you have to keep going. cindy, i'm sorry you didn't like it. it doesn't seem like you've really liked anything i've done recently, so idk what the problem is.
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Weary
Dec 8, 2007 14:21:55 GMT -8
Post by cry,crayola. on Dec 8, 2007 14:21:55 GMT -8
well, i'm just off lately. occupied. so when i'm reading, i think its like me not paying attention too much to anything. so now a days it seems like for me to like it, it'd better jump out and pull me into it for me to notice much.
probably just me. i'll put a reminder up for me to come back and read these when i'm in a better mood.
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