idle.

[cry,crayola.]

an attempt for schemes.
my first attempt at anything for a while, really.
we'll see how it goes.

forgiving passion, reach and seep
so weeping eyes and soiled hands
can truly meet and understand.
the movement flow, and unity grow
all one body. all one love.

and Lord, I beg for compromise
the skies and stars in heaven upturned
on us so feeble and weak would learn
unnecessary thoughts through chaos, distraught
all aiming to destroy.

Yeshua, my Creator and Master
come here faster, I want to go
understood, I shouldn't know
your plan revealed and hearts healed
fix us, oh so broken.

shattered hearts, deceitful minds
the kinds of tragedy left ignored
ignorantly idle as we implore
some false pursuit in which that took
all simple sense of morality.

so teach us Lord, I want to feel
love reeling in my own understanding
explaining confusion through demanding
divinely inspired / words, retired
from myself completely.

[Ramona]

so weeping eyes and soiled hands
can truly meet and understand.
Effing brilliant.

the skies and stars in heaven upturned
on us so feeble and weak would learn
The line break seems kind of funny there. Maybe move "one us" up to the first line?

Yeshua, my Creator and Master
come here faster, I want to go
"Yeshua" is kind of weird here, and I think it's because you used "Lord" twice in the rest of the poem. Now, is Yeshua another name for God or a manifestation of God? I've heard it before, but I'm not really sure...
If Yeshua is another name for God, I think you should either go for three different names or use "Lord" throughout the poem.
Also, "I want to go" doesn't really fit the tone you convey throughout the rest of the poem, but I'm not sure what you should change it to.


The rhyming scheme results in some awkward wording like:
your plan revealed and hearts healed
and
some false pursuit in which that took
and especially
divinely inspired / words, retired
and I think you should maybe just forget the inner-line rhyming in the third lines, because it takes away from the rest of the poem because you have to read over it to figure out what it says.

Also, the entire last stanza is somewhat choppy and hard to understand.
Of course, I'd wait for someone else to reply if I were you, because I just got through my first day of band camp and I feel pretty mental about now.