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Post by Ramona on Mar 7, 2005 17:42:05 GMT -8
i just now wrote this, don't like it at all. i do like the rhyming scheme (the attempted writing scheme,) but the rhythm is waaaaay off and stuff. ----- Sometimes I mistake your flaws for beauty, Then I realize that they’re just that, Flaws. Sometimes I think that just because you seem to be, Doesn’t mean that’s what you are, just Because. Sometimes I know you’re the sweetest thing, And that anyone who doesn’t, doesn’t Know. Sometimes I think that long ago I might have known who you were, But then I realize that that was long Ago.
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Post by junipercayenne on Mar 7, 2005 17:47:23 GMT -8
Rhyming scheme's O.K., but the sentences just seemed too long. But I'm not much of a poetry critic.
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Post by ScarletMornings on Mar 7, 2005 20:49:19 GMT -8
i liked it. does that say something about me? like i'm a bad critic?(even if i already kinda knew that) or are you just being hard on yourself?
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Post by Queen of Rain on Mar 8, 2005 0:39:59 GMT -8
rhyming sceme works, however how much does it add to the poem? the words in the lines with just one word could be so much more elaborated though, since they stand out in the poem and the word KNOW on its own really doesnt charm me.. excellent theme however
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