|
You
May 28, 2005 14:38:14 GMT -8
Post by Confusion on May 28, 2005 14:38:14 GMT -8
The world at her fingertip's A world unknown to most
Thrown away In spite of powerful dreams In spite of life For you
YOU
Didn't even want to know
Forever and always She was yours You knew
At your disposal There to always be taken for granted From your icy words To your empty heart
Your heart For unknown reasons She loved
The heart she cried for Longed for Would do anything for
The heart She died for
|
|
|
You
May 29, 2005 7:14:14 GMT -8
Post by Ramona on May 29, 2005 7:14:14 GMT -8
A lot of your poems follow around the same format. This poem was about a topic that's a bit overused, but it was still pretty good poem.
|
|
|
You
May 29, 2005 7:41:50 GMT -8
Post by Confusion on May 29, 2005 7:41:50 GMT -8
yup i agree, over used! i don't think there is much i could do to improve this... but i dont think it's very good realli... oh well. thanx for commenting!
|
|
|
You
May 29, 2005 7:42:54 GMT -8
Post by Confusion on May 29, 2005 7:42:54 GMT -8
whooooooooo, after that last post i noticed i've gone up to ask me for help, i know what i'm doing AND got some karma! yay!!!!!
|
|