Night Whispers (previously untitled - Pain maybe?)

[Pseudomuse]

 black and white spotted dog, 
crossed my path
	in the night I hardly saw
him though in imagination I 
saw him smile
	teeth ivory against the 
darkness told the tale
	And I swear I heard him
speak
	gruff a voice full of fur
he rattled on about duality
and the devil
	it not over
	was his catch phrase 
	as he sauntered to where the
waves and him became one

	(something inside me is breaking)

	bloodshod fireclouds burst
in the corner of my vision
and	I remember holding
the thief cloaking in a Devil’s embrace
	close to my heart
	as he screamed –I’m not insane
and I whispered
	I know you’re just searching for someone 
to understand your pain

	(something inside me is broken)
	understand my pain

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[ScarletMornings]

sweet. that was just too sweet for words. dang, that was good.

[Pseudomuse]

thank you, its now named Night Whispers.

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[Queen of Rain]

excellent, just perfect amount of words with perfect complexity and perfect clearness in how much you want the reader to think! the bracket with a thief would be better integrated but other wise all your structural attempts are amazing

[Pseudomuse]

thanks a bunch, yeah i changed that bracket thingie.

lurf
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