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Post by Sparks on Mar 16, 2005 15:54:33 GMT -8
I haven't pulled off a poem in forever... : / ahaufiufha3ew43k3434 mkl
I could save you, but you would never look back And it would end just the way you want it. I’ll summarize again, how we plan on getting out. Hold on and listen for a sound But not too hard because that is where they get you It’s where they got themselves And they got me too. (Well I should have known, my dear.) Is the act of choking a final breath so overrated after all? And to salivate on your shoulder as I come apart (I told you this was a puzzle, I told you) We always fit together like a riddle And an answer Sentiment and sound blended together. This is a dagger like you wouldn’t believe. Well now I can. You should make this quick Because the solution won’t wait. You’re taking your time (This is our only chance of getting out, hold on and listen for a sound) Time’s taking your heart. She’s taking you and making you (Do it) Don’t do it, my darling, this is beyond us What’s going on here is something (And you kissed her like she meant the world to you) I told you this was beyond us. (Don’t let it happen again) I could save you my darling but you wouldn’t value being saved. Everything will always end “as you like it”. Our red marker plan was the sheet you spilled your coffee on this morning And I can’t help but wonder if maybe we should have used crayons instead
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Post by frontpagenews on Mar 16, 2005 17:04:56 GMT -8
I love it...The format is pretty sweet and I like the feelings and such props
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Post by Queen of Rain on Mar 17, 2005 4:28:27 GMT -8
beuatiful poem with impressively effective alliterations.. i wud really recomend to divide it into many stanzas as it will be much easier to take in the content and to read,..
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Post by Ramona on Mar 17, 2005 6:52:52 GMT -8
I think it was a fantastic poem. The feelings were described accurately and the style and format of this poem fit beautifully.
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Post by Sparks on Mar 18, 2005 9:31:06 GMT -8
Wow, thank you all for replying. I really appreciate it a lot : )
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