Can't I PLEASE Fall Asleep Again??

[jackfrost]

Golden chandeliers hung
Like glittering angels
That bestowed light to all below

His face was wreathed
With his dark locks
And his bright smile shone

Around us danced
A multitude of others
But we only saw each other.

One finger reached up
And slid across my cheek
As he caressed my face

His eyes gleamed
And his mouth curved
With a happy smile

My hands clasped his own
The music swelled around
Until it throbbed deep within

He leaned down to me
And his lips met mine
In a rapturous kiss

Fire rushed through me
My heart was bursting
Throbbing...and I woke up.

[Queen of Rain]

its a nice idea with beautiful diction.. whtyhm is sort of trembling in then middle stanzas tho... but its beautiful

[jackfrost]

Yeah, it was kinda a spur of the moment thing. I wrote it in probably like, five minutes. Thanks though! It just kinda echoes my life right now...
jack

[Ramona]

That was good, nice ending. Reminded me of Titanic...then again I just finished reading the Puppet Thatre script ;D Anyways, it was an awesome poem.

[frontpagenews]

I liked it a lot, I dont really get the title but hey whatever floats your boat right? The only other thing I can say, is that the line "one finger reached up" well i dont care for it too much, maybe reword or something it messes up the flow. Other than that much props!