Drown

[Queen of Rain]

Drown

My clothes are on your bathroom floor
I think you’re drowning
In the bathtub because you cannot breath
My perfume is violet and you find it too heavy
A taste of vinegar spreads in the silence
Needles drop and safetypins hurt
You hear my sharp stilettos clink
Against the parquet floor
The sounds of feelings fading

Sorry my sweetheart but sometimes this silence
Makes me throw up
And I do these things
Fingersnails against a black board
Leaving the lights on at night
As if I an attempt to start a fight
Just to hear you say my name

It's a weird way of loving. I hope
You Forgive me for questioning
What we are doing here

[ScarletMornings]

That was good, but sad. I liked the part where you said
"And I do these things
Fingersnails against a black board
Leaving the lights on at night
As if I an attempt to start a fight
Just to hear you say my name
It has a kick butt ring to it.
Muah!
Sara

[Pseudomuse]

wow, love, I really like this poem alot, can't think of much of anything to improve. although check for spelling mistakes I think on line three, breath is actually supossed to be breathe. yeah fantastico.

PM

[Queen of Rain]

thank you for the commetns. scarletmornings: im glad ou liked that part because ive rewritten it so many times becase i havnt found it good enough..